The Australian cricket captain is a Greek ferry captain in disguise. The recent loss to South Africa was very much a case of downstairs watching the football drinking ouzo as the boat crashes into the rocks. All the passengers can see it’s going to crash and want to steer the boat to safety, as it looks pretty easy from the armchair with a beer in hand, “can’t be that difficult” they say, as the boat crashes, the lifeboats don’t deploy and the captain stands on the heads of his crew to avoid getting his hat wet. Then at the press conference, the Captain’s not sure what went wrong, promptly blames everyone else and refuses to admit we crashed at all as it was pretty dark out and even if we did crash it wasn’t my fault.
The losing is not the worst part of tragedy (shut up, the cliché puns will be thick and fast), but now having the honour of holding the top 2 places for losing sides in record run chases (one with Stuart “I’m the second best bowler in the world” MacGill and now one with Jason “Centurion” Krejza. 12 for 600 is crap in any language, even Greek. Bowlers that go for more than 4 an over in the fourth innings are 1990’s English All-Rounders. You know the type, “the next Botham” is the usual tag in the papers but little talent. The theory was that if you could not bowl and could not bat, you were an all rounder in the English team. I may save listing them all for another article. BUT The worst part is the fact that we lost to the team that continually sing that Queen song after close finishes…. “We are the Chokers…”. A team that has been able to choke so well that is has taken the mantle away from England as the champions of panic. How did we lose to them? Where was Alan Donald to run himself out when it mattered? Why couldn’t we get one more wicket to get Boucher to the crease to bring the team within sight of victory and then cock it up. You can’t lose to South Africa – simple as that.
Ricky Pontoulas must go. Bring back the Fat one I say!
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